5 Things I wish I knew before I started homeschooling

I can’t say I was one of the early pioneers, but I was definitely one of the early homeschooling families before it became more well-known after the pandemic. We officially started in 2009 when my son would have entered kindergarten. My husband was being deployed for a 15-month tour overseas. Both of us had primarily been products of public schooling from kindergarten through college.

I had no clue that homeschooling was an option after having my son. But when school enrollment came around, I couldn’t bear not having him with me and not having my husband home either.

Now my son has graduated high school and is off to his first year in college. It’s been an interesting journey for him and his younger sister. This brings me to the first thing I wish I had known before I started homeschooling.

1. Things Change

The same story that happens when we become parents can be said of homeschooling. We come into it with a vision of how our days will be: poetry with tea time, science down by the creek, field trips galore. While that may happen in some form or fashion, it most likely won’t all go as planned. Your area may have a limited support community for homeschooling, and your kids’ temperments may need something completely different. That shiny all-in-one curriculum in a box brings your child to tears.

So keep in mind that homeschooling is a fluid process. It’s one of its greatest appeals. There is in no set time or season for homeschooling. You work it out with what’s best for your family‘s situation.

Mine even went to public school because it offered things that I couldn’t provide at home. But things changed–my son found that public school no longer fit his needs, and he came home to homeschool his senior year of high school.

2. Your Schedule Isn’t Necessarily Their Schedule

Back to the parenting comparison, my kids’ nap needs didn’t sync up with what I needed during the day. And so, it also went the same way with homeschooling. My son was a fast learner, and we did our lessons over meals and then went out for field trips or enrichment activities. On the other hand, my daughter couldn’t learn while we ate. It was too distracting for her. So I had to adjust the times we spent learning. I also engaged more with group co-ops with her, as she is such an extrovert, and I’m an introvert. So I had to be more flexible with my schedule to fulfill her needs.

As I said in my first point, things change.

3. How Homeschooling Quickly Becomes Part of Your Identity

We hate labels, but we need them to make sense of what is around us. It wasn’t until my son decided to attend the new public middle school that opened up the year he would be in eighth grade that I felt a loss of no longer being a homeschool mom.

The move was good for him, as he intended to play baseball in high school. So this was an easy introduction to the rhythm of the public school system.

I felt adrift: the network of families we would no longer be seeing, the mom friendships that I made over shared classes, and adjusting to the new rhythm of a school schedule.

In my case, I was fortunate that my daughter was entering kindergarten at the time, and I realized that I was still a homeschooling parent, just starting over again.

But once you embrace homeschooling, you’ll be surprised at how proud you’ll be identifying as one.

4. It Doesn’t Take Up As Much Time As You Thought

One thing to remember is that homeschooling isn’t replicating school at home. It looks different for each family. If you had taken a child out of a traditional school, you’d wonder what they did all day at school when you finish going over a day’s curriculum by lunchtime.

Which is good and bad. It allows kids more time to devote to what interests them. It also allows a lot of idle time, which kids aren’t used to and may not have the best options for filling it in.

5. That I Would Enjoy It As Much As I Did

I often get the comments that “Oh, you’re so brave to homeschool.” or “I don’t have the patience for it.” or ” We would be at odds with each other. I need the break of sending my kids to school.”

I don’t consider myself brave nor have a lot of patience (especially as I’ve gotten older), and I’ve enjoyed having time to get administrative things done and work a bit while the kids are in school.

But I also liked knowing what my kids did all day, who they hung out with and seeing the recognition of understanding in their eyes when they grasped a new concept. I’ve enjoyed our co-op, fellowships with fellow homeschooling families, and learning new things or a deeper understanding of things that interest me too.

A Few More Words

You’ll probably find many more things that surprise you about homeschooling, but the overarching theme is flexibility. Be kind to yourself on this journey. It is custom to you and your family. However, it turns out it was the best for you and the family at that moment.